[Day: Friday, Oct. 12th. Time: 2:00 p.m.] [Yesterday you invaded a Covenant stronghold, where you rescued Togo from the hands of Rachel and Helga. Rachel got away, Helga, not so much (what'd you do with her, by the way?)] ( And who's logging? ) (She was left, gasp, to Togo!) (So ask him.) ( Can't, he's drugged. ) (I have log, but it will time stamp. ) (Same here.) (Can, he's the one who decide. :P) (And I log, as does RDM, IIRC.) (Timestamps are easy to handle.) ( Ok. ) [Togo's still drugged up, so today you all decided to take the day off. OR SO YOU THOUGHT!] (Day off? We have work on days off.) * Dicesuke (akodomakot@ip68-13-166-245.om.om.cox.net) Quit (Ping timeout) (Well, Ten and I do. ^_~) (My instance runs! ;_;) * NinjaDebugger (amakoto@ip68-13-166-245.om.om.cox.net) Quit (Ping timeout) [Instead, you're in a snowy mountainous area. There's a thick fog surrounding you, and you can't see more than a few feet in front. It's also snowing!] (Will be better off when we make more money!) (... how did we get here? >_>) [Why are you there? Who knows. Togo and Herman aren't, though.] [Session start!] (How did we get here.) (Did we just suddenly arrive?) ( A good question! ) (Do we wake up? What?) (No. It's not. It's a question you need to answer.) ( You're there. :P Whatever you were doing, now you're not. 'Cause you're there. ) * Alys looks around and shivers. "What. The hell." She sneezes and glares at the fog and snow. (So it was a flat teleport.) (BArring impetus to the negative, Ashley is contemplating his hate for axes, and getting incredibly plotzed. Unless you're teleporting us, no.) ( Or something. Either way, you're there. ) (No. Not or something.) ( Oh, Ashley's getting plotzed all right o/~ ) (You _decide_. You are the _GM_. If you're going to get us somewhere we had no choice in, you decide how. :P) * Dicesuke (akodomakot@ip68-13-166-245.om.om.cox.net) has joined #BESM * ChanServ sets mode: +v Dicesuke (Stop being ambivilent.) ( I have decided. You, however, have no idea. ) * NinjaDebugger (NinjaDebug@ip68-13-166-245.om.om.cox.net) has joined #BESM * ChanServ sets mode: +o NinjaDebugger (Then we were 'teleported', or as close as possible, not 'or something'.) ( You're free to assume that. ) (Brett. There is a transition.) (You _must define it_.) ( Mecha. What is so hard to understand about this? ) (I'm going to have to back him up on this.) (If we percieved it as jump-cut teleported, that's what you have to say. Not 'or something'.) (There's a significant difference between "moved suddenly away from tequila into wherever" and "suddenly overcome with overwhelming urge to go wherever.) ( You know how you got there about the same way you know the exact millisecond you're going to fall asleep and wake up. I.E., you DON'T ) * Pocky-kun (Pocky-kun@ACC7E822.ipt.aol.com) has joined #besm (So... our perception was that we were there, and then we are here, a-lal a jump-cut teleport.) ( Yes, like I've been saying. ) (Not 'or something'.) (No, not like you've been saying. Try not using 'maybe' and 'or something' when defining the most critical part of the setup, okay?) [At any rate, there you are.] * Lukas is, perhaps surprisingly, not in the standard leather, because he wasn't out. Jeans and a black t-shirt with 'Orange Julius' on it with in orange, and not in the familiar letters either! Looks like someone blended 'Led Zepplin' with 'Orange Julius'. Oy. He's also not wearing shoes. He falls to the ground, because he was sitting, and whirls his head to take in the area quickly, saying as he does, "Wh- fucking magic!" * Ten stays perfectly still as she also falls to the ground. Today she's wearing a simple white shirt, an even simpler brown skirt, and what are probibly immatation heavy leather boots. She also has a teeny sword and her wings are made from transparent plastic. * Khalil doesn't blink, but immediately starts to feel some backwards motion from his sitting position as he topples backwards. "" He flails a bit and his arm juts out suddenly to catch his falling note binder before he lands with a "poomph" in the snow. But the binder is safe! * Alys is shivering pretty badly, actually, because her hair is wet and she had just finished getting dressed when she was suddenly wherever she is. * Ashley appears, in suede pants and a shirt with a very large panda on it. He staggers precisely three steps to the right, drops the shotglass he is holding, and falls to the left into a snowbank. "Oy! Moi creme de menthe!" (Next time, Ashley has a showdown with Ten. ) * Khalil speaks from his position in the snowbank in French. <"This is really no time to be worried about a silly drink, is it not?" > * Lukas stands up, saying, "Who the hell are you, french guys?" * Khalil speaks slowly and carefully. "No, I am afraid not. You sound familiar..." * Ashley responds in Gaelic, not that anybody understands. "Pissant bartender! I had twenty pounds left in the jar!" ( I should clarify, the fog isn't so thick that you can't see each other ) (... .A few feet?) (You gave us a few feet.) ( It's more like, you can't see past 30 feet ahead. ) (Perhaps not, but Khalil's half buried in snow anyway.) (... oy.) (And still laying down. ^_^;) ( gimme sight checks ) 2d8-2 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Khalil (2d8-2) and gets a natural 8 for a result of 6. 2d8 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Alys (2d8) and gets a natural 9 for a result of 9. * Lukas suddenly ignores the frenchies and starts running towards Ten. And now he can even see her! 2d8 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Ten (2d8) and gets a natural 5 for a result of 5. (I win) 2d8-2 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Lukas (2d8-2) and gets a natural 8 for a result of 6. (I also do some winning!) (I did not win!) * Khalil sits up slowly and mutters in Arabic. <"I think I damaged my tail."> He's rubbing his sore bottom. Under his usual robe are jeans and a t-shirt. 2d8 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Ashley (2d8) and gets a natural 8 for a result of 8. (Made.) (Oh wait, yes I did! Looked at the wrong stat. ^^;) [Most of you notice the brief movement in the fog behind you.] (Which language is Alys speaking? Still French?) (Yup.) * Lukas can't define 'behind', unless we're all in the same direction, and he's too busy grabbing Ten and scooping her up, putting his fingers against her body in a spread out pattern. * Khalil turns around to look towards the movement and sighs, taking off his robe and tossing it to Alys. "Here. I doubt anyone would worry about me out here. Besides, you need it more." He shivers a little and rubs his arms before trudging on. * Ashley stays right put in the snowbank. * Alys grabs it and puts it on. Slight warmth! "Merci! And thank you, even! Where are you going, anyway?" (Look at the other channel, Brett. We're trying to keep Ten from being whatevered by the evil GPS.) [There's more movement from the fog, and five men come running out. They're wearing thick red armor and carrying spears, and bellowing really insightful battlecries of "Aaaaaaaahhh!"] * Khalil points in the direction he's going. "That way." Ack! Holy fuck! [And they charge right past you.] * Khalil stops for a second as they pass him and just stares straight on without turning. "Please tell me I did not see what I just thought I saw." [But it is! And more follow!] * Alys watches them go by. "Honestly, this kind of thing never happened before I joined up with you guys." She walks over to Ashley. "Need help getting up?" * Lukas finally shifts Ten in a more normal grip and mutters in response to Alys, "Fucking agreed. I don't know why I put up with this yanked around by magic shit." [A noble-looking warrior in gold armor, atop a white steed, rides out next. He's got a beard and a mustache, a cape and a pointy helmet. He points his sword forward and cries, "Go forth, and crush these scoundrels beneath our feet!" He must be important, because his name is hovering over his head in blue letters: Yuan Shao] Toots! What's a nice girl like you doin' in a like this? It is not like we had a choice in this case. * Alys snickers. "I have no idea! Come on, standing is a happy thing." She tries to pull Ashley to his feet and ignores the warrior guy. * Khalil 's tail perks up at Ashley's voice and he looks over that way. "What is he going on about?" (Warcrack has followed me into MC3. Izzy told me I shouldn't keep playing, but nooooo...) * Ashley allows himself to be dragged upright. "That sounds like the winged dude. Kha... Khan? Kublai? Dude, you've GOT to let me in to Xanadu. Mongolian chicks are fi-hiiine." [Well, for all the warrior guy is talking, he actually just sits on his horse. More troops run past you, though; some in red armor, some in gold. They're all armed with swords, spears or these things that look kinda like scythes.] ...I'm from Saudi Arabia, not Mongolia. I think he just tried to pick me up. And he seems very drunk. You know what would be cool? A sobering spell. * Lukas adds sarcastically, "And hopefully you're not a chick. Look, something's CLEARLY wrong here. It's like some sort of video game." * Ashley looks around. "'s cold, right? My drink maybe got frozen. Creme de menthesicle." He giggles. Normal people don't have floating goddamn text. * Khalil looks at Lukas. "Not..." He actually looks down to check, just in case. "No, not this time." Yes, but when's the last time you met someone normal? And yes, I thought of that as well. * Ashley finds his spilled shotglass, and the non-frozen alcohol. "Aw, bollocks. Knew I shoulda got the absinthe." * Khalil sighs and closes his binder. "Physics can wait." * Lukas shakes his head and looks off in a direction. "It's going to have to. I don't know what the fuck's going on, but if we stay here we'll never win whatever the hell this is." Beat, then a muttered, "God, what the fuck." * Lukas starts moving in a direction as he holds Ten. It's amazing. * Ashley actually looks around. "The fuck are you all doing here? The fuck are we?" (Brilliant! Can he walk and chew gum at the same time too?) (Sometimes.) * Alys walks up to Yuan Shao and avoids the running crazy guys. "'Scuse me, but where are we?" Don't know, don't care. Someone's playing a game with us. That is what I would like to know. [Yuan Shao sits there and... kinda looks bored.] [He ignores Alys, though.] And if you are going to be insulting and crude, it would pay to at least learn some creative cursing. I can teach you some in Arabic later if you would like. * Alys waves her hand. "Hello? Are you an NPC, or something?" Louder, "HELLO?" Cursing isn't about creativity. It's about things being fucking stupid. [He doesn't respond!] Granted. Nngh... used to know some, maybe. Been a while since the Templars. * Lukas keeps walking. "Come the hell on, people." * Khalil looks up at Yuan Shao and contemplates for a moment before saying, "Can we take his horse?" * Alys sticks her tongue out at Yuan Shao before going back to the others. "This sucks. And it's still cold." * Khalil walks along himself, huddling his arms up. "I am tempted to force myself to sneeze just for the warmth. Feathers and fur make natural insulators. * Ten starts to move and draws her sword! "Like, we must defeat Dong Zhou!" * Lukas looks down at Ten for a second and then says, with a smirk, "That sword's not gonna do it, hon." * Ashley stumbles along. " But, we've got an entire army if we can figure out how to order them around! This is awesome! Perhaps we *are* the army. * Ten tries the point and shout interface. "Move North!" * Lukas just keeps walking. * Khalil looks above Ten and the rest to see if they have names floating over them. [Fer sure. And as you walk, you hear the sounds of battle ahead! The guys in red are fighting some guys in purple. Among those in red is another warrior on a horse, a man in red and gold armor, with "Sun Jian" floating over his head. And with the purples is a muscled guy with a scarf around his head and a spear, with "Niu Jin" floating over his head in red letters.] [You must be on the reds side, because a group of purples suddenly attacks you! Gimme init rolls.] 2d8+13 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Alys (2d8+13) and gets a natural 10 for a result of 23. * Ashley shakes his head. "So... why're we here, again? I mean, I was kind of havin' fun in the bar." 2d8+7 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Ten (2d8+7) and gets a natural 9 for a result of 16. 2d8+7 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Lukas (2d8+7) and gets a natural 9 for a result of 16. 2d8+14 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Khalil (2d8+14) and gets a natural 7 for a result of 21. 2d8+7 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Ashley (2d8+7) and gets a natural 5 for a result of 12. * Lukas glares at the purples. "Fuck if I know. You think I can just look at them and make them fall over?" ( We'll be using the same inits the whole time, by the way. ) [Alys!] [There's five guys commin' atcha] (Doesn't matter. I don't have a WEAPON I CAN USE.) ( Damn. Gonna suck when you need a weapon upgrade for more combos. ) (You have two combat chars. Congrats c.c;) (*waves her sword around!) (And Khalil's without his whip.) * Alys sighs and unclips her chains, which she did put on with the rest of her clothes. "I dunno. I just finished a damn shower, and now -this-!" She swings them at the first guy that comes near her. 2 2d8-2 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Alys (2 2d8-2) and gets a natural 12 for a result of 9 10. (Nope.) At least you're so fresh and so clean. [Alys swings prematurely and misses!] [Khalil!] And wet and cold! That too. That is not a good combination. * Khalil dashes forward a little towards the nearest purple guys, aiming a backhand to the face. 2d8-4 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Khalil (2d8-4) and gets a natural 12 for a result of 8. [Of the five guys facing you, four look exactly alike: Guys with their hair done up in buns, wearing tunics and breeches. The fourth is in full scale armor with an open-face helmet. They all have swords.] (Swing and a smack.) [Khalil punches the guy! He twists around and falls over.] [Ten!] (Well more backhand so the whole arm hits his face solid but whatever works. ^_^;) [Oddly enough, the guy Khalil knocked out vanishes after a few seconds.] 2d8-3 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Ten (2d8-3) and gets a natural 8 for a result of 5. (made by 2) * Khalil isn't much surprised. It's a video game. [Ten pulls two guys to the ground! Likely more than she expected. However, she fails to get their swords. These guys seem to have an iron-hard grip on their weapons.] [Lukas!] * Lukas does NOTHING. It's the power of being a noncom. (Full defense.) [Ashley!] * Ashley goes invisible, because drunk is trouble. (Full defense.) [The two remaining guys swing at Alys and Khalil! Gimme def rolls!] 2d8-2 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Alys (2d8-2) and gets a natural 8 for a result of 6. (Made.) 2d8-4 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Khalil (2d8-4) and gets a natural 3 for a result of -1. (That might be a make there.) [Both Khalil and Alys avoid the attacks. Alys's turn!] * Alys unleashes her full fury and anguish against a random guy! In other words, she attacks again. 2 2d8-2 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Alys (2 2d8-2) and gets a natural 9 for a result of 12 7. (Made one by one.) [Alys hits the guy once, but that's enough to put him down. Khalil!] * Khalil crouches down low and waits for one of them to approach, then grins, spinning his tail at him in a flash. 2d8-2 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Khalil (2d8-2) and gets a natural 11 for a result of 9. (Just make.) [Khalil knocks him out! Meanwhile, that guy Niu Jin comes over, brandishing his spear. "I'll take you on," he cries, and swings at Khalil.] 2d8-4 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Khalil (2d8-4) and gets a natural 11 for a result of 7. [Khalil avoids being skewered! Ten's turn!] * Khalil blinks at that as he ducks the spear. "You'll do what now?" Get him! 2d8-3 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Ten (2d8-3) and gets a natural 10 for a result of 7. * Awaymancer (pancake@216-229-75-230-cablemodem-roll.fidnet.com) Quit (Read error: Connection reset by peer) [He doesn't seem miffed about missing. He doesn't display much emotion at all, actually.] * Awaymancer (pancake@216-229-75-230-cablemodem-roll.fidnet.com) has joined #BESM * ChanServ sets mode: +o Awaymancer [Ten drags this guy to the ground too, but oddly enough he bounces back up. A lifebar appears under his name, and drops about a third.] [Lukas!] * Lukas ... continues to do nothing except look annoyed and watch the live targets. (Full defense.) [Ashley!] (Consider my action held in perpetuity until I actually decide to bother exposing myself to get killed.) * Ashley remains invisible. Where am he? WHO KNOW ( K ) [Alys!] * Alys grins when she sees the lifebar. "Oh, this is cool! I wonder if we get a neat prize for winning." 2 2d8-2 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Alys (2 2d8-2) and gets a natural 14 for a result of 11 12. (No. Gah.) [He blocks Alys's attacks with his spear! Khalil!] * Khalil looks at the man. "I do wonder." He draws back his fist into a fighting position (as if he wasn't in one already) and tries to high kick the spear out of his grasps. 2d8-4 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Khalil (2d8-4) and gets a natural 11 for a result of 7. [Khalil hits the spear and the guys stumbles, but he retains hold. Ten!] 2d8-3 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Ten (2d8-3) and gets a natural 15 for a result of 12. [Ten fails to do anything! D'oh.] [Lukas!] * Lukas starts moving northeast, around the combat engaged people. He still looks annoyed. [Ashley is hiding! And Niu Jin does nothing, 'cause he's staggering from Khalil's attack. So... Alys!] (Actually, I'll take my attack.) ( Oop ) [Ashley!] * Ardweden (ardweden@herring.sandwich.net) has joined #besm [Ashley does something! But the guy seems to have no reaction at all. Alys!] * ChanServ sets mode: +o Ardweden (Safe trip, Ard?) (Yes, but I'm exhausted.) * Alys swings at the guy again, not expecting much, because the dice dislike WD today. 2 2d8-2 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Alys (2 2d8-2) and gets a natural 6 for a result of 13 4. (Made one by four.) [Alys smacks the guy, and he falls over, crying, "So this is to be my final battle." Like the others, he disappears. But! He leaves a bowl of meatbuns behind when he goes. It's floating in the air, so it's probably not dirty.] * Alys takes the bowl. "So... anyone want one?" [And Alys also shouts, "Enemy officer defeated!" whether she likes it or not.] I bet they heal or give you more HP or something else awesome! [Some other guy respons, "That's what we've been waiting to see!"] * Khalil calls out to Lukas. "I know you are anxious, but it might not be a good idea to wander if more come after you." He lowers his leg, half at the attack and straightens himself. [And Alys can't help but eat the meatbuns the second she touches them. It's like she's possessed.] * Alys does so. Are they yummy? * Lukas just responds, "It's a game. If I know my luck, we have a timer." (Do they taste like game coding?) [They sure are! And not only that, but "Max HP +10" appears over her head.] Yes. You could also be killed. Granted, perhaps you will respawn but do you trully wish to take that chance? * Alys looks up and grins. "Hell yeah! ....I wonder what it was before. Oh well." No, not really. Heych pee up! Cool! Ten lower? ( Brett, you have an unnatural obsession with meat buns. ) [To the north is a wooden fort. It's launching thick pointed logs at the reds. To the west is a stone fort with a heavy gate.] ("MEAT BUN!" *Clamps onto a random breasteses* o.o) * Lukas shrugs idly. "Ever since I started this it's all been me about to die. Get cut in half a few times without a chance, you stop caring so hard." Smirk. "Besides. It's a video game." A video game with meatbuns of awesomeness! This is so much better than the last random teleport. [The reds are going in both directions.] On that, I would have to agree. At least I am not one of the ones that obtained breasts that adventure. ( Khalil did, just not in the way he's thinking ) It looks as if we have a choice. I do not feel like dodging flying logs. Does anyone else? I want a control menu, actually. -That'd- be cool. * Ashley unvanishes. He wobbles his head. "Logs very bad. Titania, my head." We could so get all the mobs to fight for us! But they won't listen. [They are fighting, though.] * Lukas decides to go west. "Probbly stupid." * Khalil makes his way towards the stone fort. * Alys follows west. [The stone fort has a big heavy gate. Outside are some men armed with spears and shields. One of them has "Gate Captain" over his head. They're engaged with the reds, especially a big beefy man wielding a large iron mace. "Huang Gai" is over his head. He looks pretty no-nonsense badass.] [He does the work for you and beats the gate captain down. No sooner does he do that than the doors open.] * NinjaDebugger is now known as SleepDebugger [There's more guys inside. One has "Defense Captain" over his head. But there's also an open gate in the back of the fort, if you feel like ignoring him and pressing on.] * Ten points with her bitty sword. "Charge!" * Ashley stumbles along, slightly more steadily. Adrenaline or time, take your pick. * Alys keeps going. "Onward! Battle and glory! Other similar exclamations!" * Lukas chuckles and just walks on, trying to keep from getting cut up. "Yeah. Right." [You walk past them! Following the mountain road behind the fort, you meet up with some people in blue, who just kinda stand there. There's also a box and a big clay pot near them. ] * Khalil just keeps walking along, eying Alys in a curious way. * Lukas keeps looking around. "You know, you'd think I'd get tired of asking 'why' every time something like this happens, and yet... too many years of programming." I think we should take a lesson from Alys. * Alys blinks. "Ooh, box and pot. That looks relatively safe and considerably video gamish. I call the pot!" She goes over to it and looks in. [They just stand there and ignore you. You also pass a man on a black horse. He's wearing a purple robe and has a very stylized sword. His mouth seems fixed in a permanent scowl. But he must be on your side because his name, Cao Cao, is in blue.] [Alys finds she can't actually look inside the pot. Yeah, it's weird. ] BOX! I assume you break it. * Khalil walks up to the box. Bah. Stupid pot. * Alys kicks the pot. * Khalil punches the box. * Lukas holds onto Ten and says in a low voice, "See? Now you've got everyone doing it." * Ten tugs on Luka's shirt. "C'mon I wanna see what's in it!" [The pot smashes, and there's a meatbun inside! Just one, though, and not in a dish. But it is floating in the air.] Does anyone else want this one? [And when Khalil punches the box, it also smashes, revealing ... another box. But a different kind: It's flatter, smaller and more decorative.] * Ten giggles. "Boxy boxbox!" Boxes with boxes in ! The best kind! * Khalil picks up the box and inspects it. Open it! [When Khalil does, it vanishes! "Get WEAPON" appears over his head.] * Lukas rolls his eyes, but it's a practiced thing. * Ashley pays careful attention, his eye steady but the rest of him wavering slightly. "Oi, hot stuff... you sure we're here, and I've not got the DTs like Margaret Thatcher after a six-day bender?" Takers? Anyone? Calling once. ... huh. Guess that's how weapons work in this thing. What kinda weapon was it? Huh? Huh? Huh? Uh... * Khalil inspects. [Khalil finds nothing. The box vanished, and as far as he can tell did not bestow him with a weapon.] * Ten is practicaly bouncing with excitment on Lukas's arm. * Alys shrugs. "Right, mine then." She takes the meatbun. Weird. I am not trully sure. [Alys is compelled to eat the meatbun as soon as she touches it. "Life +50" appears over her head. But as she was uninjured, she feels no different.]] * Lukas glances to Alys. "If it's life or whatever, I haven't been hit yet. Can't matter too badly." What's it look like? C'mon show it to me! I bet it's awesome and powerful and cool! Oh man, I wish I could've saved that. I... did not really get anything. * Lukas shakes his head. "Video game logic. C'mon." * Lukas keeps walking. * Khalil searches on his person for any weapon. [Khalil finds nothing!] * Khalil shrugs and walks after Lukas. Onward! For, like, more boxes! * Alys follows cheerfully. "D'you think I can buy this game later? It's neatish awesome." * Ashley follows along. [You move onward, and soon a large fortress comes in sight! Catapults launch boulders at your troops while they clash with the enemy at the fortress's gate.] * Lukas glances to Alys. "Uh. I give you my permission if it's real and not some sort of made up trap" Official permission, excellent! Gotta find the gate keeper! * Lukas smirks to himself. "Yeah, sure. You can tell your father your crazy non-related uncle gave you permission." [That's not hard. He's got "Gate Captain" over his head.] * Lukas points helpfully. 'Cause he's like that. "Go forth and make little cuts in him, Ten." Nah, I don't know where my dad is, so I don't think he really cares. * Ten brandishes her sword mightily! Perhaps she can present it to the Queen of England when we return. * Khalil heads on towards the Gate captain ploddingly. * Ashley looks down at Ten. "We must get you drunk sometime. That you comprehend this is fascinating." * Alys keeps going. For glory! She can't get drunk. [Your side defeats the gate captain before you can get there! They start running in, only to scream and run back out again as a man on a large red horse trots out. He's got thick eyebrows, a crescent-shaped halberd, and a really weird headress that looks like two really long caterpillers spouting from the top of his head.] [Lu Bu is his name. And he's glowing with a yellowish aura. Oooo.] She's a freaking do--oh look, a boss. ["Scum!" he cries, "I'll squash you beneath my feet!"] * Ashley waves his hands. "Can't you download some alcohol or something?" * Khalil still tries in vain to bring forth a weapon. * Alys yells back, "Your feet aren't -that- big!" Like, glowing's probibly a bad thing, ya know? [Khalil fails. Meanwhile, Lu Bu wipes out five troops with one swing and gallops towards you.] Duude! He's, like, uber! And not even the main boss! [He arrives and tries to whack Khalil. Def roll at +2, Khalil!] 2d8-2 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Khalil (2d8-2) and gets a natural 10 for a result of 8. He's what!? Did you download a guide, Ten? [Khalil gets whacked. Ouch! While there's no blood, his head is ringing. Alys's turn!] * Ten points at Lu Bu. "Biiig problem now!" (Say, is that a demonic duck?) * Alys whacks back, to avenge Khalil's poor head. 2 2d8-2 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Alys (2 2d8-2) and gets a natural 7 for a result of 8 5. (Both!) [Alys hits Lu Bu twice! And... He doesn't even flinch. His lifebar appears, but barely goes down at all.] * Katherine (ardweden@herring.sandwich.net) has joined #besm Ah, shit. [Yuan Shao shouts, "Forget Lu Bu! Take the detour up the mountain road!"] [Khalil!] (It's some old lady!) * Ardweden (ardweden@herring.sandwich.net) Quit (Ping timeout) * Khalil staggers and shakes his head to clear it. "I think we should follow his advice." He looks for the detour if he can find it and starts heading up that way. [Ten!] 2d8-3 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Ten (2d8-3) and gets a natural 7 for a result of 4. ( Ten, use your Rozen Mystica! ) (XD ) [Lu Bu flies off his horse suddenly! But he does a backflip in midair and charges at you. And da-yum, can he run fast.] [Lukas!] Hey! That's so totaly not fair! * Lukas smirks faintly. "But it's what we needed." Lukas goes for the horse! ( Of course not, it's Lu Bu :P ) (And now Lukas wishes he had the Shadow saddle.) [Lukas gets on the horse! Gimme a riding roll (horse) ] (What is riding?) ( Riding For riding animals ) (Any of the three) (I think he means Body. :P) (Any of the three is fine with me.) ( Oh right. Body ) 2d8 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Lukas (2d8) and gets a natural 5 for a result of 5. (You are awesome!) (All logic says I should not have made that, but I did.) [Lukas controls the horse!] (Sweet! Red Hare!) (LOGIC DOES NOT APPLY!) [Meanwhile, a man in green with a huge glaive-type weapon and a long beard rides up to Lu Bu and starts fighting. "Guan Yu" floats over his head.] [He provides a distraction!] * Lukas barely mangages to control a horse. "Fuckin' christ. Can't they use a ancient oriental motorcycle?" But, like, it's one horsepower! [Guan Yu continues to provide a distraction, unless you wanna try fighting Lu Bu again.] * Alys snickers and runs after Khalil. * Ten goes wherever Lukas goes, which is probibly the back door. * Ashley follows the group. He looks bewildered. * Lukas mutters, "I need more goddamn horsepower," and does, in fact, go for the back door. Two out of two crazy people can only vaguey be wrong! [You go around the side path! There's a stone fort there, like the one you were at earlier, but it looks like your guys have taken care of it. However, they haven't taken care of the guy guarding it. He's wearing blue, and carrying another big glaive-type weapon. He's got a small mustache and a beard, and wears a fancy hat.] ["Zhang Liao will stop you!" he declares. And that must be him, because the name over his head says so.] [Alys, go!] * Alys laughs and attacks. "Alys Onedyr will stop you first!" She's really having too much fun with corny lines. 2 2d8-2 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Alys (2 2d8-2) and gets a natural 10 for a result of 3 8. * Lukas says, "God, more people! Disappear already!" (Both!) We have to beat them. Then they disappear. Yep! [Alys clocks him twice. His lifebar drops about 1/8th. Khalil!] * Khalil shakes his head and turns around towards Zhang with a roundhouse. 2d8-4 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Khalil (2d8-4) and gets a natural 9 for a result of 5. [Khalil hits him! He doesn't drop the man's life as much as Alys, though.] [Ten!] 2d8-3 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Ten (2d8-3) and gets a natural 7 for a result of 4. [Suddenly the guy flies up in the air, his lifebar dropping a bit further! But it doesn't work quite like Ten intended, as he hits the ground again momentarily.] [Lukas!] * Lukas just keeps the horse under control, muttering a, "Fucking come on already..." (Full horsey defense!) [Ashley!] * Ashley mutters under his breath, and waves his hand. He still looks a bit disoriented. 2d8-4 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Ashley (2d8-4) and gets a natural 10 for a result of 6. [The man stumbles. Probably not quite what Ashley wanted to happen, but better than nothing, right? Right? Alys!] * Alys spins around once, swinging the chains around as she goes. It looks flashy, but it doesn't actually help in any way. 2 2d8-2 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Alys (2 2d8-2) and gets a natural 16 for a result of 0 14. (Made one.) (That's such a weird roll.) (...) (You got a critsuccess and a critfail.) (In the same roll pair.) (Yes. Yes she did.) ( Aiyah... ) (You deserve an award.) (What. The fuck.) (...) (Impressive) (I try.) (That's cause for pizza. Let's go get pizza.) [Alys swings her chains! Once catches on the other and they snag awkwardly and fly out of her hands, hitting Zhang Liao on the forehead and knocking him out.] (Only a 0.0244% chance of occourance!) ...that works. * Alys blinks, then jumps in the air. "I rock!" [He says something, but I forget what his deathcry is. Alys, however, shouts, "Enemy officer defeated!" again.] AWESOME! [A sword appears when his body vanishes!] You so totaly rock! * Alys goes over to her chains and untangles them. "Thanks!" (Is this the end of...Zhang Liao? *cough*) ( Oh, right. ) [He says that.] (I'm just making it up. ^^;) (Am I right?) (c.c;) ( I think you're right for DW4, but I think his line in 5 is different ) (That's disturbing.) * Lukas mutters, "Thank fucking something or other," and rides in! On his shiny red horse. (It's shiny.) I betcha that's an attack up! * Ashley trots along. (Oh, I missed the sword.) * Khalil looks at the sword. "I wonder if it was telling me to get a weapon." He looks at Alys. "Do you mind? It was your kill. I'm not a loot camper." * Lukas rides over the sword instead! Ha ha. "It's a fucking teleported-to-fake-video-game. Good god, Khalil, try not to roll for the thing." [When Lukas does that, the sword vanishes and "Attack +1" appears over his head.] ... and, of course, a sword is not a sword. Video game logic. (Lukas has less of an excuse to not fight!) * Khalil just stares at Lukas. Obviously he doesn't understand gaming ettiquette. "Wonderful. Someone who does not attack gets the attack bonus." Eh, maybe I can run into them. He probably needs it more than us, though. Ride on! Not if he does not attack. Besides, it was Attack up, not accuracy. * Khalil heads on after Lukas. * Alys walks along, feeling very proud of herself. [The mountain path leads to the top of the fortress's wall. Some stairs down to the inner area of the fort are just in front of you.] * Lukas walks the horse up to them and frowns before trying to walk the horse down them. It might work! [A beardless man in a robe and a hat, wielding a sword, opposes you! Over his head is "Jia Xu"] * Khalil heads down stairs...and sighs at the opponent, drawing back his fists and shifting his stance...again. [The horse goes down the stairs with no trouble at all.] [Alys!] * Ashley nearly trips going down the steps. * Lukas can go down stairs on horses! AWESOME. What, no random entry battle line? I feel cheated. 2 2d8-2 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Alys (2 2d8-2) and gets a natural 15 for a result of 10 13. (Neither!) ( He's only a minor officer. ) ( But eh... I'll give you one. ) [Alys swings prematurely as the man rushes up the stairs, yelling, "In battle, one's head is not simply for filling a helmet."] [Khalil!] * Khalil stands firm and shakes his own head before throwing a straight punch his way. 2d8-4 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Khalil (2d8-4) and gets a natural 13 for a result of 9. [Khalil misses! Oi.] [Ten!] (...no he doesn't.) ( Oh. ) [Khalil hits! Oi.] [Ten!] 2d8-3 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Ten (2d8-3) and gets -1, a CRITICAL SUCCESS!!! "I'm down with that. You know me." (!) (Ten crush.) (Like Kompressor) (TEN TAKE YOUR CANDY!) [The man suddenly falls down the stairs and says, ... erm, I forget. Let's say he says, "So... are my strategies not good enough?" Then he vanishes, leaving behind a shield.] ... I need a WEAPON, people. ( Lukas needs Get WEAPON! ) * Lukas gestures angrily at the shield. Falling on your sword is so not the way to win! Defence up for Khalil! * Khalil heads for the shield and picks it up. [It vanishes when Khalil touches it, and "Defense +1" appears over his head. And now, more riding. Onward! For victory and BOXES! * Lukas urges his horse onward. "Yeah. Sure. Boxes." You think we're almost there? [Not much further, you run into a large man with a big beard, big belly and big nose. "Dong Zhuo" is over his head, and he wields a wicked looking piece of jagged metal that only vaguely resembles a sword.] * Ashley follows. "I bloody hope so. This' the longest hallucination yet." Actually in this case, boxes did carry some sort of weapon before. ["I'll put an end to you!", he declares. Alys's turn!] Video game. We call them 'video games', Ashley. Boss time! It seems as if this is one unending comba--of course it is. It is a video game. I'm so silly. Aren't those like telly programs what you use special remotes with? * Alys attacks him! "Your sword is freaky looking and not at all swordlike!" 2 2d8-2 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Alys (2 2d8-2) and gets a natural 9 for a result of 8 7. * Lukas eyes Zhuo as he sorta manages Red Hare in place. "... yeah. Like that. Except we're in one." (Both!) Or something. [Alys smacks him twice! His lifebar goes down about an 8th.] [Khalil!] * Khalil turns to sweepkick him. 2d8-4 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Khalil (2d8-4) and gets a natural 10 for a result of 6. Well, thank you very much. I was going to be perfectly fine thinking this was all in my head, but now it's bloody time for therapy. * Awaymancer is now known as Sleepmancer [Khalil sweepkicks him, but he gets up pretty quick for such a big man.] [Ten!] But it's awesome! Look at these textures! The polygon count alone must be enormous. * Lukas looks like he wants to smack his forehead, but he CAN'T because he's on a HORSE. 2d8-3 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Ten (2d8-3) and gets a natural 11 for a result of 8. What? Silk? Burlap? It's for sure not egyptian cotton. [Dong Zhuo bounces around and loses some life. Lukas!] * Lukas mutters, "Well, let's try it," and tries to run Dong Zhuo over in ancient chinese driveby. [The horse charges, but when it reaches Dong Zhuo it rears back and refuses to run over him.] [Ashley!] * Lukas wobbles in the saddle and says, "Whoa! Fuck! Jesus christ I hate video game logic!" * Ashley circles around and waves his fingers. "Blasted intelligent telly people." 2d8-4 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Ashley (2d8-4) and gets a natural 15 for a result of 11. [Nothing seems to happen! Dong Zhuo jumps up, though, and takes a swing at Lukas, who needs a def roll.] 2d8 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Lukas (2d8) and gets a natural 11 for a result of 11. (Uh. No.) [Lukas is slashed! His skin doesn't break, but it does hurt. He also goes flying from the horse's saddle.] [Alys!] Eeep! * Lukas flies! Whee! Or not so whee. "Ack! Ow! Wh--" *thump* "Lame." * Alys attacks some more! This could get really repetitive, but Alys has a relatively simple mindset, so. 2 2d8-2 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Alys (2 2d8-2) and gets a natural 6 for a result of 9 4. (Made one by four.) [Simple but somewhat effective, as she smacks him some more.] [Khalil!] (AFK a sec.) * Khalil attacks with dual chops at the neck. Oof. 2d8-4 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Khalil (2d8-4) and gets a natural 7 for a result of 3. [Khalil's attack hits! Ten!] 2d8-3 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Ten (2d8-3) and gets 13, a CRITICAL FAILURE!!! "You always hurt the ones you love. I love you very much." (...) (Dicy is crithappy tonight) ( Mmm Lukas, gimme a body roll! ) ( Luuuuuukas ) 2d8 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Lukas (2d8) and gets a natural 13 for a result of 13. (You're wasting your time. I made my one body roll for the day.) (Miss by, uh, 8.) [Dong Zhuo suddenly staggers forwards and gives Lukas a biiiig hug!] [Lukas's turn!] (Back.) Oh, god, at least this game doesn't have smell. * Lukas knees the guy in the groin. No getting fresh with him! (Do I get a 'Dong Zhuo's a moron who hugged me' bonus?) (Or is it impossible to hit?) ( Nope ) ( Normal attack :P ) 2d8 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Lukas (2d8) and gets a natural 9 for a result of 9. (Oh, good. Then I somehow miss him.) (Despite him hugging me.) (And being right there.) [Lukas somehow missed him! Ashley!] (Yeah.) ( Lukas has bad hit detection ) (video game logic! Don't you feel the love?) * Ashley frowns, and fingerwaves again. ( Zhang Fei could miss soldiers in 3 and 4 if they were too close, too ) 2d8-4 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Ashley (2d8-4) and gets a natural 6 for a result of 2. (Doesn't have to be video game logic. Could be RP logic. He has a high AC.) (The touching rule is THERE FOR A REASON.) [Dong Zhuo stumbles! He misses his turn! Alys!]] (It's because missing that was stupid.) (Anyway.) (Bedtime. Good night, guys. So tired.) (G'night Ard.) ( Nights ) * Katherine (ardweden@herring.sandwich.net) Quit (Quit: Gikathud.) * Alys swings her chains around. 2 2d8-2 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Alys (2 2d8-2) and gets a natural 8 for a result of 3 6. [Alys clonks him twice, and he falls over, saying, "My life... of pleasure... gone.] [Everyone poses victoriously!] I have the best kill rate in this game. Excellent. ...I do not wish to know about his life of pleasure. Aww, I only got three. * Khalil just shakes his head. * Lukas rubs his head. "I think I can live with a respectable 0." From now on, I spot-weld a shotgun to my arm. That sounds painful. [Suddenly, you're all dumped in a heap by the side of a familiar turnpike outside the city.] I bloody told you. DTs, pure and simple. ... I wasn't drinking. Oof! Not cold, hooray! * Lukas runs his hand back over his hair. * Khalil gets dumped. "Yes. Except it does not work in mass." * Alys takes off the robe and hands it back to Khalil. "Thanks again." You say that now, but we've been wandering outside pretending to be on horses for the past bloody hour. * Khalil takes the robe back and looks it over. "It is no problem. I actually do not like wearing it much." So... why do you? [Khalil finds he got dumped with some baggage: He's holding a new whip. It's got a stylized handle with a Chinese lionhead at the end, and the whip itself is mustard yellow. ] * Khalil looks at Alys then points to his tail. "Security." Hey, if I was really imagining? My motorcycle would be RIGHT HERE. * Lukas points off somewhere. Ah, right. (Lukas's motercycle is right there.) (I would be unsurprised.) * Khalil then inspects his extra baggage. "...interesting." You'd best hope not. Driving drunk's a good way to have to fabricate a whole new identity. * Ashley yawns. * Khalil folds it up and then gives it a few practice cracks in the air. Eh. * Ten puts her little sword away and then goes still. Wouldn't be the first tie. Wonder why Pipe Guy and Togo weren't there. Weird. Oh well, they missed out on the fun! Also, I think you should come up with a new theory, Ashley. There is no way you can convince me I was drinking. (tie/time.) I was drinking water? Maybe the water in the pipes is hallucinogenic! * Khalil eyes Alys. "From the shower?" Mass hysteria. Communicable hallucination. I did it all because I was extremely bored. Alteration in the space/time whoozis? Yes. Dammit, my hair's still wet. Argh. I think a better explanation is "You are full of it" Ashley. * Lukas rolls his eyes, gauges his direction, and starts walking. "Another day in the life, people. I'm going to break a rule and start drinking early today." I fell onto the wagon while wandering around. Wait up for me. * Alys starts walking back towards town. "One day, I will buy a mobile phone, and then I can just call a taxi." * Khalil sighs and shakes his head, putting on the robe but not tying it. "I guess that is that. Can I walk you home?" To Alys. [And so they went home. Session End!]